31 July 2007

New US-Mexico border fence threatens "Wild Life"

Mexican officials are urging the US to cease production of their 700 mile long fence. They threatened to file a complaint with the International Court of Justice claiming they are "altering the eco-system of the desert and threatening the wildlife of the area."

"If they build this fence," said an unnamed Mexican governmental official, "all the water, insects, and pollen wouldn't be able to cross it either. There are Jaguars, black bears, and apes that cross these lands freely."

Although we couldn't speak to president Felipe de Jesús directly, when asked about a possible alternative that would allow jaguars and other wildlife to cross, but curb illegal immigration, a trusted advisor exclaimed "they should be focusing on 'live' fences, such as those made out of cactii. These would appear much safer for the animals to squeeze by, and no logical human would try it."

US Homeland Security Secretary, Michael Chertoff, embraced the idea, stating "after getting stuck between two cactii, I believe this actually would eliminate the 'wild life' of these illegal apes.